27 February 2007

Baby boy breast boycott

So. Little Daniel Robert is heading into week three of the Great Breast Boycott of 07.
He still won't latch on and nurse, preferring instead to have a silicone bottle nipple forced into his mouth while he reclines and lets engineered and artificial ingredient-laden formula drip into this mouth.
As a processed-food aficionado, I can sympathize. It is, however, quite frustrating for this mother who nursed Annalivia for 15 months after a tumultuous start and just assumed that baby #2, who was, gestationally, a whole two weeks older, would be able to nurse like a little champ. Not so, not so. And it ticks me off.

When Annalivia was born and I found myself tethered to her side 24/7 and at her beckon call, I developed a whole theology based on breastfeeding. It basically went something like this -- God is the Big Boob in the Sky* who offers everything that God's children need in terms of nourishment, nurture, etc., is constantly in demand, constantly offers Godself again and again even unto the point of giving God's entire being to us....
(And now, adding to the theology based on my experiences with Daniel)
...which we still don't find satisfactory and thus seek artificial substitutes that fill us with lesser nutrients for our lives, but somehow fulfill enough in us to keep us placated for a little while at which point we will start crying out to God for the nourishment which is offered all along, but which we will not accept. And then we'll seek out the fake stuff again and be placated again. For two or three hours, at least.
That sounds about right, eh?
It's a wonder God is so patient with us. I'd be really, really ticked off.

*And lest you think this is just as blasphemous as can be, please note that the term El Shaddai in the Bible, which is translated, "God almighty," is derived from the Hebrew word "shad" meaning in all its translations in the scriptures, "breast," and thus, perhaps El Shaddai would be better translated, "God the great breast-like" or less literally, "God all-sufficient". "Boob" may be, perhaps, a little coarse...

10 comments:

Crystal said...

"God is the big boob in the sky"...

Now that right dar is funny!

Sorry things aren't going well with the breast feeding. I LOVE your analogies though!!

Jimmy said...

oh my lord jesus. i can't stop laughing.

you are one crazy mama.

A. Lin said...

Before I had children I would have said that you didn't try hard enough to get Daniel to latch and nurse. I know better now. I have talked a lot to plenty of mothers who nurse and didn't nurse. While I have had success with my boys, not every mother's experience is the same with nursing. You are doing what is right for your son (I mean, what else can you do with a baby who boycotts the breast?).

I really like the "God is the Big Boob in the Sky" quote. And then you back it up with how the Hebrew translates!

April said...

I would have thought the same thing, ALin! Amazing what I knew before children that is lost to me now! :)

Alure said...

Hey, I nominated you for the Rev Gals Wednesday Festival. They got the link wrong, but I posted the correct link so hopefully some folks will show up. This post made me laugh out loud! Thanks.

Susie said...

I showed up through RevGals! I've been reading back entries now to catch up because you are hilarious! But beyond funny, this post made me laugh and think... what an appropriate analogy for Lent! And you thought the season snuck up on you.

will smama said...

Thank you for this. I LOVE it. My son would not latch on either and soon we had the disconnected picture of me being hooked up to a pump while I gave him a bottle with my other hand.

I too heard through the grapevine that some thought that if I let him get hungry enough he would latch on.

Good luck - and thank you for this great post.

Songbird said...

For me it was the third child who did not want the breast...and I never got her back on it, despite successful nursing of the first two. Every child is different. Thank God/Boob, we have options when it doesn't go smoothly!!

Magdalene6127 said...

Too, too perfect. Found you through RevGals... love your blog!

Mags

Sally said...

love this!