Mr. Charmer

In which my mainline friends disown me

So last Sunday at FCC Rock Falls, we had a patriotic sing instead of the sermon. It was a full-fledged we-love-America-palooza with national hymns, secular songs both fun and more serious.

In preparing for this event, I talked to a couple of pastor friends and told them the plan. Their response was something like, "Are you serious?" or "Oh no..." I told them I had thought about ways to justify it theologically and that I didn't want to embarrass either them or me, so I'd not share the thoughts, but as I've been thinking about it more, I want to do so and then get feedback from anyone who is willing to talk about it.

I'll begin by saying that I believe that using the Bible to support national superiority is wrong. I don't want England or France to be reading the Psalms or Romans with that sort of interpretation, so I feel like the same should apply to us. But I am just not sure that any national celebration or recognition in the church is "wrong."

As I told my church before we sang had our America-fest, I think most of us are smart enough to realize that when we say that our country is blessed, we don't believe that others in their countries are less blessed. Most of us don't apply a belief of selective blessing to our families, do we? I mean, I believe the McStews are abundantly blessed by God, but I would never assume that meant that God does not bless the Jones family and the Razinskis and the Al-Shamas. When I say "God bless America", that is my heartfelt prayer -- that God will bless our country. It is not a prayer that God will not bless England or France or Iran or wherever.

And as for expressing gratitude for the blessing we have received and will receive as a nation in the setting of corporate worship in the church building, I frankly don't understand the idea that we shouldn't bring these realms together. If the church does not exist to speak to our everyday lives, including how we live as citizens of a country or members of a family (in the case of Mothers/ Fathers Day which also tends to be loathed by mainline pastors) or brothers and sisters in the realm of God, I guess I wonder -- why do we exist?

I have to admit, I was a person who, for many years of ministry, resisted all of the things I was supposed to resist as a mainline pastor -- patriotism, overt displays of Christian identification in marriage, child-rearing and family formation (more about that later), celebration or recognition of "secular" concerns...but I have to say -- I don't know why I did. I wasn't thinking critically nor was I praying about where God would have me lead. Now, I really believe I *am* thinking critically. And I most certainly am spending a lot of time in prayer and believe that God is leading me the direction of recognizing that being a Christian is about bringing faith to bear on absolutely all areas of life including our national identity.

So -- those of you who heartily disagree with anything I've said -- what has led you to your conclusions? I really honestly would like to know, because I think I've missed something. And if anyone can tell me what that is -- well, I'd sure appreciate it.

In the meantime -- God bless America. And happy Independence Day.

19 days to go...

Hope this, this, this and this will sustain your trip back to Hogwarts.

Encouraging report

Yesterday I went up to Rockford for a post op visit and to review the pathology report on the bone that Dr. K removed on Tuesday. Turns out that there was no infection in that sample! That could be perhaps because that particular sample was not infected, or it could be that the bone is not healing because of a "fibrous non-union" meaning that there is tissue impeding the bone growth.

Whatever it is, it meant that I was able to have the splint removed yesterday and I am now in a cast that allows movement of my fingers and elbow. This is a huge help because my fingers and hand were very swollen and painful. Being able to move them has reduced the swelling and it is almost back to normal. Further, the doc said that I can go ahead and pick up my children and that it would hurt, but I would not be doing any damage to it. So that is good, too.

The best news, though, is that I am to stay on my mega doses of antibiotics for at least two weeks and then I am to have another blood serum drawn. If things look good, it is possible that they could proceed with the bone graft in the next couple weeks as opposed to after a couple months of antibiotics. Which means this whole thing could be over sooner rather than later.

So. Obviously I can type and I'm pleased about that, though it is cumbersome and rather painful, so I probably won't do much of it. Knowing me, I'll save my finger energy for truly frivolous stuff rather than the bulletin and sermons and such.

The family is all doing well. I am so blessed to have a family who just arrives when needed. It's lovely.

Anyway, thanks for all of the well-wishes. I'll respond to y'all soon.

All is well

The surgery went fine. Now it hurts, but will get better.

Dad was here and has handed off to Gramps. Dad took Annalivia for long, long walk everyday. Gramps is playing with her in the basement. She's in heaven with these playmates.

It's hard to post, so I probably won't or will leave it to Dennis.

And here I was going to get the corkscrew

On the night before surgery, my supportive sistah, Kali, has delivered these words of encouragement...

Hey Apey,

Just wanted to let you know I'll be thinking of you tomorrow when you get your robo arm attached. Maybe if you got one with a bottle cap opener attachment, Marissa would be more likely to come home and visit us after she gets married. Just something to keep in mind.

Love, Kalin

Menu Plan Monday for the week of June 24

This week because of surgery on Tuesday for me, almost every main dish we will be eating will be from the freezer (denoted with*). My little church is unpredictable at best, when it comes to providing food to a pastor, so this is the plan and if food arrives, we can rearrange easily.

Monday -- Black Bean Burritos* (adapted from this recipe) with salsa, sour cream, avocado, and tomato; homemade Mango Yogurt Popcicles*

Tuesday-- classic Tuna Noodle Casserole*; Salad; Applesauce

Wednesday -- Sausage and Pepper Hoagies*; Salad; Cinnamon Apples (This is one of my dad's favorite sandwiches and since he is coming up to help post-op, I thought we'd have it. I cooked the sausage and the banana peppers and juice and then added the other peppers and onions, leaving them uncooked. All is frozen together so it will be easy to reheat and place on crusty ciabatta rolls.)

Thursday -- Lasagna*; Garlic Bread*; Salad; Oranges for dessert

Friday -- Olive Cheese Bread*; Italian Beans and Greens Soup* (recipe follows); Salad

Saturday -- lunch -- baked Macaroni and Cheese*; dinner -- Brats* on the grill

Sunday -- lunch after church -- Grammy's Meatloaf* (recipe follows) and baked potatoes; dinner -- Cheese Ravioli with Sauce*

Italian Beans and Greens Soup

olive oil

2-5 cloves garlic, minced

1 onion chopped

2 bunches endive, escarole, kale or spinach (though I prefer the bitter greens), chopped to whatever size you prefer

4 cups chicken broth

2 cans white beans (great northern or cannellini are good)

Saute garlic and onions in olive oil. Add greens and wilt. Add broth and beans. Heat through. If freezing, do not wilt greens much and don't heat broth and beans. FYI -- I think I adapted this from Rachel Ray

Grammy's Meatloaf

This is my favorite meatloaf. It is well-seasoned, but not overpowering and never, ever, ever dry. I usually make 2 or 3 at the same time and put the extras in freezer bags, pressed flat. This allows the meatloaf to defrost quickly. It can then be shaped and baked or put in the crockpot.

1.5 lbs ground beef or beef/turkey mix

1 envelope Lipton's onion soup mix

1/2 c ketchup

1 egg

1/2 sleeve saltine crackers, crushed in your hands (not finely crushed)

1/4-1/2 c. water

Leaving water out, mix all together with hands. Add water slowly to facilitate mixing til it is quite moist, but still holds shape. Freeze or form into loaf for baking. If married to Dennis Stewart, put ketchup only on top. If Grammy, mix ketchup and brown sugar for top and slice green peppers and onions very thinly to decorate the top. Cook uncovered, basting occasionally, until browned and delicious outside and moist and yummy (and done) inside about 45 minutes. Use a thermometer if necessary.

Click here for more great menu ideas.

The plan

So a woman with whom Dennis went to high school called his mother today to find out his new address so that he could be invited to his 20th reunion next year. His mother, being the nation's most stalwart privacy advocate, did not give out the information, but the whole episode led us to discuss how we were both having class reunions next year.

Me: You know, perhaps we should use this as the reason to go on a big diet and become fabulous.

Dennis: (pauses) Or.... (dramatic pause) if not, we should hire actors who can play us.

Imaginary Classmate to hired actor (voiced by Dennis): Dennis, you've changed a lot. I don't remember you being black...

There's just something about a capable man

Yesterday, Dennis finished putting up the poles for a chain link fence in the parsonage yard. He was going to stretch the chain link today, but since it's raining, he'll be getting that tomorrow.

Whenever Dennis launches into a project like this, I once again admire his abilities to do all things mechanical. And I mean-- ALL things. I don't think Dennis has ever met anything he can't do. Everyonceinawhile, he has to stop and think before proceeding, but most of the time, he just understands how things need to be done. And he understands every step that needs to be taken to get to the point of completion so that the job is done correctly. And he does it. Or, if he takes a shortcut, he takes it knowing fully the impact that it will have on the finished product.

I'm not sure where he gets this brilliance. He comes from generations of farmers and laborers. They built their own homes and wired their own electrics and fixed their own cars and tractors and combines and invented solutions to problems if the solution hadn't been invented yet.

This kind of thinking is completely impressive to me. My dad is a financial planner. His father, my Gramps, was the president of the bank. They do a different kind of processing in their daily lives. Gramps is pretty good at fixing and building and such, but it doesn't just roll off of him like it does Dennis. Dennis just knows. And he does. And whenever I see that, I just kind of swoon. Because there's just something about a capable man, y'know?

Crunch time

It is a lovely morning here in northern Illinois. It is softly raining and a little chilly out and all the windows are open so I can hear the birds who are singing loudly. And since it is raining and has been raining, I don't hear the Harleys that usually plague our town on a summer Saturday.

Dennis has taken the kids over to his brother's house to play with their Stewart cousins and see his other brother and his family. The other brother's family lives in Wisconsin and we've not seen them for a couple of months.

I am ducking out of festivities in favor of trying to get some work done before the surgery on Tuesday. I made a bunch of casseroles for the freezer last night and will make some burritos and lasagna and meatloaf to freeze today. I also am trying to start and finish bulletins for a month, since it has occurred to me that I won't be able to type. Again. So I'll need to get the liturgies written ahead of time and sermons in some sort of rough outline. And we are also trying to work on getting the house a bit more organized. We'd like our live-in help next week (i.e. Dad and Gramps) to be able to navigate the basement where the spare bed is without threat of bodily injury. Or at least, with minimal threat.

It has occurred to me that this is the kind of preparation one does before one has a baby. Only one usually has more than a week to do it. And one probably doesn't attempt to do it all. Unless that one is me.

So. Clearly, I should be doing something other than blogging, so I shall. Happy Saturday.

I'm addicted

And the first step to recovery is admitting that you have a problem.
I'm think I'm addicted to The Pioneer Woman. And her other blog, Pioneer Woman Cooks.
She is sort of who I want to be with half of my personality, especially if you could mix a little Vicar of Dibley in there too. The other half wants to be Ruth Bell Graham. That could be a fun party. And I suppose it explains a lot of about me.

Anyway. I have been enjoying her blog, and most of all, her photos. I'd highly recommend her photos to everyone and her blog to those who have a pretty evolved irreverent streak. Those who don't, I still love you. I just wouldn't invite you to this shindig.

Recipe: Old-fashioned uber-delicious cake

I got this recipe from an online friend. She titled it Grandmother's Autumn Cake, but since it's not my Grammy or Ga's recipe, I wouldn't feel right about using that title. And it's really seasonless. So. Here it is.

Old-fashioned uber-delicious cake
1 1/2 c oil
1 3/4 c sugar
3 eggs

combine and beat 3 min.

3 c. flour
1 tsp salt
1 tsp baking soda
1 1/2 tsp cinn
2 tsp vanilla

Mix with above and fold in 3 cups (3-4 apples) chopped apples and 1 c. nuts (opt).

Pour into loaf pans or cake pans or whatever. Bake 1 hour on 350 (and this will look done far before that, but it won't be. Don't be fooled).

Buttermilk Icing
1 stick butter
1 cup sugar
1/2 tsp baking soda
1/2 cup buttermilk

Bring to full boil (you need a large saucepan for this...it doubles) and pour over hot cakes.

These ingredients can be easily interchanged by substituting honey, whole wheat flour, coconut oil or butter, etc. These cakes freeze and keep BEAUTIFULLY if you use the buttermilk icing. The author of the recipe said she took one out of the freezer a year later and heated it up and it still tasted fresh and delicious.

Where two or three are gathered...

Last night we had an elders' meeting at church. In our system, the elders are the actual leaders of the church. Technically, I'm just an ordained elder. I like elders' meetings. These are the spiritual leaders of the church and most of these men and women take that duty very seriously. They are mostly very wise, deliberate, and discerning.

At the end of every elders' meeting, I lead a prayer as we hold hands and then we all say the Lord's Prayer together. Because there are only 10 of us, and it's rare that all of us are actually there at the same time, we fit nicely around one of the round tables in our fellowship hall.

I have found that one of my favorite things about this time is listening for each individual voice as we are praying together. I hear Larry's strong bass and Kathy's mellow alto and Carl's gravely tenor. I hear Tim strong, but not overpowering and Edythe's slightly rushing and Alice and Sharon, quiet and low.

There is something to be said for common, memorized prayer. As a restoration movement who was founded on the idea of returning to the New Testament description of the church, this is our sole common prayer. But I understand why other sects have found such power in shared, memorized prayer. There is something about all of God's people speaking as one voice the words of the faith from their hearts that reminds me of the reason we are all Church together.

"For where two or three are gathered in my name, I am in the midst of them..." Mt. 18:20

Bone blues

We had an appointment at the orthopedic surgeon in Rockford today to discuss results of a nuclear medicine bone scan that I had last week. My ulnar bone is not healing and apparently shows signs of infection. SO... on Tuesday of next week, June 26, I will be going to Rockford Memorial for surgery. They will open up the wrist again and remove the $25,000 of hardware in there now and then put little antibiotic beads between the bone (oh -- and scrape out all the infection --ick). Then they'll sew me up, splint my wrist, and the plan is that I'll get to go home that evening. They are then going to give me two very strong oral antibiotics which will hopefully knock out any remaining infection. I'll have an appointment about 72 hours after the surgery and they will put on a cast, I think. Then 6-8 weeks from now, I'll have another surgery where they will do a bone graft and put in new $25,000 titanium plates. And another splint. Then another cast.

Fun times. The State Farm insurance used by the chica who hit us is SO going to pay for this.

Anyway, I am anxious to get this whole thing done with already. I am tired of my wrist hurting and tired of not being able to settle with the insurance company and tired of driving to Rockford to wait for hours to be able to talk to my very competent, though humorless doctor (when I jokingly inquired as to whether it was possible that I could get a hook out of this, he said, "No, no! You'll keep your hand!" Um, yeah, thanks. Hadn't figured that out, Dr. K.)

I'm not so much nervous about the surgery as the splint. It will go over my elbow and hold my wrist so that it cannot rotate. After surgery, it was impossible to pick up Annalivia and I don't know how in the world I'd be able to hold Daniel, but I'm sure I'll figure something out. And showering with a bag for the next 3 months doesn't sound fun, either. But I guess it has to be done.

So. There's the update. More later.

Mr. Loudon Wainwright

I don't think I've gushed here about how much I like the voice, style, etc. of Loudon Wainwright. I found him when I was in seminary and the cool NPR station at the University of Kentucky (WUKY) converted to "adult rock" programming in the afternoon. It was basically like listening to a daily music sampler of somewhat obscure music. From them, I met Paul Kelly and The Kings of Leon and KT Tunstall and Mason Jennings and Badly Drawn Boy. They mixed this with Bruce Springsteen and Bob Dylan and the Beatles and Colin Hay and Marianne Faithfull and to this day, I try to listen to their afternoon programming via the web whenever the children are taking naps and I remember to do so. (For some reason this music doesn't seem to work with awake children for me.)

Anyway, I met Loudon there and loved his music. And tonight I heard a new song, "Daughter" on World Cafe and realized that I'd like to get his new album, however, it's written for the new movie Knocked Up and there's something about owning "music inspired by the film 'Knocked Up'" that bugs me. I know, I know. I pre-judge. I'm like that. But if someone else in the family wanted to get it and burn me a copy and just write the name of the album on the cd with a Sharpie -- that I'd be ok with.

And fyi, the voice of Rufus Wainwright (L's son) drives me nuts.

More milestones and the haunting wisdom of Amalee

Tonight we managed to catch Daniel rolling over. We've known that he is able to do it, we just haven't seen it before. He always seems to roll over in his crib or on the floor when we are out of the room. Sneaky lad, but we caught him this time.
And tonight Annalivia had a showdown with us at the dinner table. I'm happy to report we won. It was a full-blown temper tantrum with all stops pulled out. Dennis and I remained calm and firm and also loving and a little funny. We were pretty pleased with ourselves.
All of this to say -- a couple months ago, Amalee posted this reflection and it has been running through my head constantly since then. On one of the blogs I enjoy, a commenter reminded other mothers of toddlers that "the days are long, but the years are fleeting."

These women are so very right. Time has moved so quickly already. May God make me aware of the brevity of these moments and make me truly grateful for every single one.

Menu Plan Monday for the week of June 17

So as part of my small goals toward more peaceful living, I am creating a weekly menu plan. I am trying to do this on Sunday evenings because I've decided to take Mondays as our errand day when we will be running over to Clinton, IA where gas is 30 cents cheaper per gallon, the grocery store is large and has carts shaped like trucks thereby entertaining Annalivia, and the goat's milk we use for Daniel's formula is two dollars cheaper. Plus I get to get out of town and they have a drive through espresso hut over there where I can get an iced latte. And a Target. So we all end up pretty happy.

Anyway -- I found a link to the Organizational Junkie's Menu Plan Mondays on one of my blog jogs (the only kind of jogging I'm apt to ever do) and decided to participate this week. If you click here, you can find a list of lots of participants and lots of good ideas.

So here is our menu plan, fully realizing that usually these things don't work out quite like this because we get too many leftovers piled up. I'm trying to be bettter about planning that, though, so hopefully this week we won't make too many adjustments.

These menus reflect a.) mainly what is already in our freezer or pantry, in terms of main ingredients b.) the desire to use the grill or crockpot rather than the oven because it is so bloody hot and humid right now. FYI -- the pastas are whole grain, and since apples are on sale this week, we'll be eating lots of those with everything.

Mon -- Grilled Talapia Filets with Lemon Garlic Sauce, grilled zucchini, apples. -- Grill fish. Saute garlic in butter. Add lemon juice, little frozen pesto (about 1/2 teaspoon) and reduce a bit. Pour over grilled fish.

Tues-- BBQ Pork Sandwiches, crudites and dip, apples -- the pork is in the freezer from a pork shoulder roast I got on reduced sale and cooked in my pressure cooker a couple weeks ago. I'll put it in the crockpot with some BBQ sauce and let it defrost and heat while we are at the doctor's in Rockford. I have meetings at church on Tues., so even if I don't get back in time to eat supper, Dennis can handle this easily.

Wed -- Cheesy Broccoli and Alfredo Calzones, apples -- an attempt to use some leftover ingredients based on this recipe, though substituting alfredo for marinara sauce, obviously, and using whole wheat for the flour. If we have too many leftovers of the above foods, I will just cook this and put it in the freezer for later.

Thurs -- Chicken in Foil Packets on the grill, and Apple Skewers. This is a Dennis request, so we'll use whatever veggies he'd like and do the classic foil packet dinner.

Fri -- Homemade Mac and Cheese, sweet peas, apples. Hopefully this will be in the crockpot.

Sat -- Spaghetti with Bolognese sauce and salad. And apples.

Dreams fulfilled

Once upon a time, not too very long ago, I bought a little flower sprinkler in Target one year before I even met Dennis. I thought it was adorable so I got it though I had no need. I was working constantly at the church, living alone in this parsonage, praying and imagining that perhaps one day I would have beautiful children who would play in such a sprinkler, but also quite sure that would never actually happen.I also prayed, prayed, prayed with all of my heart for someone who would love me and cherish me who I could trust and who was capable and intelligent and clever and kind and would be a wonderful husband and would also be a wonderful father. But I was quite certain that person would never actually arrive, let alone blow bubbles for our daughter on a day when he was trying to get work on a car finished. When I was little, about 5 or maybe 6, I had a beautiful porcelain doll. Marissa had a matching doll that was slightly different. They had orange-flowered dresses and I thought they were just hauntingly beautiful. Mine had medium brown hair and big brown eyes and little bangs cut straight across her forehead. I used to pray to God that one day I'd have a daughter who looked exactly like this doll. And when I was out of college I found a precious advertisement for flooring of all things that featured a little reddish-blond haired, blue-eyed little boy and I tore it out of the magazine and carried it with me because it spoke to me so strongly.
Now, I know that God is not in the business of wish fulfillment. And I would hate to suggest to others who have hoped and prayed far more deeply than I could ever imagine that the Lord has ignored their requests and granted mine. I just want to mention that my heart feels very, very full of blessing today. So many of my dreams are real. And I am so very thankful.

Perhaps stranger things have happened

Or maybe not. Read this. Watch your back.

Hilarity ensues

So tonight I went down to Peoria to hang out with my sistahs. We met at Kelleher's a faux-Irish pub that we always go to and, upon observing the 20-somethings engaging in their prairie chicken dances, decided to go elsewhere. So we went to a cool Cajun restaurant that Lil and Kalin have previously enjoyed and ate good, if perhaps slightly overpriced, food, had water dropped upon us (well, on Roo, anyway) by the waiter with whom Kalin and Lil went to school, planned Roo's wedding reception, or at least got her to give us license to plan it, and laughed so much that my stomach hurt. Good times, good times. I've got some very, very cool sistahs. I'm sure I've said that before, but it bears repeating. They are just plain cool.

They are also not exactly punctual (which is an inherited McClure girl malaise we all share), so while I was waiting for them to get to Kelleher's, I listened to this hilarious interview (edited to add -- if you don't have time to listen to the whole interview, try starting about 13:15 into the interview) with the guys who are in a new HBO series, Flight of the Conchords and laughed til I cried. Since we get exactly 4.8 channels via cable (PBS comes and goes at will), I will have to wait for the dvd's. But if the interview is any indication of the show's cleverness, it will be worth the wait.

She cooks, she cleans, she quilts! (but not really)

I am making a concerted effort to be more dilligent in the mother/ wife/ co-keeper of the home areas of my life. I've not yet arrived where I'd like to be in my progress, but I am progressing. Slowly. Incrementally. Perhaps microscopically. But progressing.
Anyway, I have some little goals which may seem just ridiculously little to some of you. Some people are just really, really good at juggling all areas of life. Me... um, not so much without a whole lot of thought and effort.
So... here are my plans.

1. Try eating out only one meal per week. To that end, I've realized we need

- a menu plan of fresh, healthy food

- foods that are easy to throw together quickly

- a well-stocked freezer and pantry

- a list of what is in said freezer and pantry

2. Keep the house liveable. For us that means

- Make beds

- Put away toys before naps and bed

- Keep the table mostly clear

- Keep the dishes washed

- Keep the laundry pile low

- Keep the kitchen floor swept

Bonus points for...

- Putting the dishes away

- Putting laundry away

3. Do something creative that is largely unrelated to church such as...

- Blog

- Garden

- Paint

- Make a collage I've had in my head for 5 years

- Quilt -- I actually took a quilting class for the first time last night and have another a week from Saturday. I'm excited to use my grandmother's Singer sewing machine that she gave to me to sell, but that I'm going to keep because it is going to be perfect for me in my life as a quilting Bee.

So that's it. Small things that make a big difference. I'll let y'all know how it goes.

More interpreted than interpretive

The kids and I went down to Eureka on Sunday, not for any real reason other than to spend time with the family. It seems as though we just didn't see them much during the fall, winter and spring. And now we need to rectify that.

It was a good visit. We got to spend time with Mom and Dad and Kalin and Lil and her family. And we also got in a good visit to Grammy and Pa. They were excited to get Daniel down on the floor and Annalivia was excited to get Gramps down to his basement where many toys are kept and where her greatgrandfather runs a fascinating play area with such things as a manual typewriter. She loves it.

One of the highlights of the trip for me was getting to see Kalin's Strawberry Scones dance. I had promised to bring her some scones if she offered something in exchange. The dance began with toes pointed inward and was not only pointy and crumbly, but also flaky. It also had narration, so it was less interpretive than interpreted, but I appreciated it just the same.

Once again, Eureka offers good times for the heart, soul, and avant garde artistic sensibilities.

Recipe: Really good strawberry scones

I was reading a Family Fun magazine at a doctor's office last week and saw this recipe for strawberry scones. They looked delicious, so I made some up today and am pleased to report that they are indeed delicious! Annalivia helped to dump the stuff in the bowl, mix it with a fork, brush milk on the top and sprinkle sugar on them.
Here are my revisions. You can find the original recipe here.

Strawberry scones
1 cup finely diced fresh strawberries
1 cup white flour
1 cup whole wheat pastry flour
1/3 cup sugar, plus a little for sprinkling
1 tablespoon baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon ground nutmeg
A lemon, for zest
8 tablespoons cold, unsalted butter, cut into 1/4-inch pieces
1/2 cup plus 1 tablespoon milk
1 tablespoon vanilla extract

1. Heat your oven to 425°F. Line a large baking sheet with parchment paper, using a few spots of butter or cooking oil to stick it in place. Set the baking sheet aside.

2. Place the diced strawberries on several sheets of paper towel to absorb their juice. Meanwhile, combine the flour, sugar, baking powder, salt, and nutmeg in a large bowl. Zest lemon into the ingredients, taking care to remove just the outermost skin and not the white pith.

3. Cut in the butter until the flour-coated pieces are the size of peas. Add the strawberries, tossing them gently with a fork to coat them.

4. Make a well in the mixture. Blend the 1/2 cup of cream and vanilla extract in a measuring cup and pour them into the well. Using as few strokes as possible, gently stir the dough until it forms a ball. Let the dough sit for 1 minute.

5. Clean and flour your hands and dust your work surface with flour. Place the dough on the floured surface and knead it gently three or four times. Transfer it to the large baking sheet and pat it into an 8-inch circle. Cut into 8 wedges. Use a small spatula or pie server to carefully separate the pieces, leaving at least an inch between them.

6. Brush the tops of the scones with the remaining tablespoon of milk, then sprinkle the surfaces with sugar. Bake the scones until the outsides are crusty and starting to brown, about 18 minutes. Let them cool on the baking sheet for 2 minutes, then slide the parchment and the scones onto a wire rack to cool for another 20 minutes before serving.

Backing up blogger

So I decided to answer my own question about backing up blogger and looked for info on how to do it. It seemed way too complicated, so I just did these things.

1. Went under Settings to Formatting and changed the number of posts displayed to 500. This displayed all of the posts on the main page.
2. Went to the Page settings in Explorer to View Source.
3. Saved the Source in a Word Perfect file.
4. Opened it in Word Perfect.

It's not a perfect representation of the blog, but certainly good enough that if it were lost, we would have a backup. It imported all the pictures, too. Hope it helps someone else, too!

First haircut

Daniel got his first haircut tonight. It was necessitated by the weird mohawk/ mullet combination he had cultivated over the last four months. It was giving his head an odd flattened look. And rather than wait for it to grow out, since I am one of God's most impatient creatures (second only, perhaps, to Annalivia) I decided it needed to be cut.

So Dennis got out the clippers and gave Daniel his first buzzcut. Which makes him look even more like a little Stewart. I should have cut off a lock and kept it for the scrapbook before we started knowing that eventually Dennis would see the wisdom of my suggestion to just cut it to its determined length all at once, but didn't. So though I was saddened by the sweet little pile of soft and dark baby hair and this milestone that indicates he's growing up, I did not do anything other than flush it down the toilet. And post this on the blog.

Illustrated synopsis

Edited to note: Blogger has changed the saving procedure and for some reason it is throwing me off! I keep saving drafts and then forgetting to publish them! Oops!

So the last few weeks have been pretty busy around here. We went down to Eureka on Memorial Day weekend and stopped at a park so Annalivia could play on the way down.We had a great time with our friends Joby and Trina and their son Ethan. We stayed at Trina's parents' house while they were away and then went to my sister Lil's house for breakfast and the Memorial Day parade. The breakfast was wonderful and the fellowship was just spectacular. Annalivia and Ethan chased each other around and Dad introduced Daniel to prolonged leaf-gazing. The parade, which is my favorite of all parades, was very sweet in its brevity. This last weekend was the tribute dinner for my college voice professor. I was in charge of the event and was very worried about it, but it went perfectly and was just a wonderful evening. We laughed, we cried -- it was better than CATS. And speaking of cats, my friend Todd, whom I had not seen for 5 years, and I reprised the Rossini cat duet that we sang for our junior recital. It was great.

The following day was the Eureka College alumni weekend celebration, which I managed to skip out on and got to see my friends Remy and Sarah. It was so good to see Sarah, whom I hadn't seen in a good 3 years. She had never met Annalivia or Daniel. It was nice to spend time together, though far too brief.

When we got home on Sat. evening, I laid down with Daniel at 7:30 p.m. and then slept for the next 11 1/2 hours. It was nice. I probably could have slept for many more. When I got up, we went to church and my sermon went well. We had coffee and treats fellowship after church, which was great, and then we did lots of other errands with the loads of time we have now that are on the summer schedule of having church at 9 a.m.

When Annalivia and Daniel awoke from naps, Annalivia and I took our babies for a walk up and down our street while we waited for Daddy to get home.

These days have been so full. Full, but good. Thanks for sharing them with us.

Table prayers

We have been singing The Doxology at our table for the last few months as our grace. It is a nice way to thank God for our food and it teaches Annalivia a song she hears in church also. So far, she only joins in with the words, "host," "ghost", and "Amen."

I was reading one of my little books on table prayers at church today and thought that perhaps we should branch out a little. I remember reading L'Engle's books about the Austins and O'Keefes and their table prayers that were hymns or canons or writings by the great spiritual thinkers of the faith. I thought that perhaps my family would be like this. Not so much. We're doing good to keep little fingers out of the macaroni until the end of a 16 measure song.

Before Dennis and I got married, I wrote a prayer that I hoped we could use as our family table prayer. It proved too long for him back then. It's still a hope that we might incorporate it someday, but for now it remains in my head awaiting use. I bring it out sometimes for funeral lunches at church. It's a little easier to keep fingers out of the macaroni there.

All that we have,
all that we are,
all is a gift.

All is from you, God,
all is to you, God,
for it's by your grace that we live.

Being a daughter of Clara

Every once in a while (and actually more often than that, if I'm honest) it occurs to me that it is just impossible to be a mother and a pastor at the same time.
But tonight I spent some time reading about Clara Babcock. Clara was the first officially ordained female minister in the Christian Church (Disciples of Christ) back in 1888 or 1889. But before her official ordination, she was an evangelist, speaker, and elder who baptized many individuals, according to our church records here at First Christian, Rock Falls. Rev. Babcock was an unflinching preacher and led many revivals around our area. She was not one to let much stand in her way. And there are stories told of her preaching and also rocking her child to sleep in a cradle set behind the pulpit.

Every once in a while (and more often than that) I am fairly convinced that it is impossible to mother and pastor at the same time.

But the 1,502 people Clara Babcock baptized during her life would probably tell me otherwise.

Of peonies and parting places

from the archives for Memorial Day weekend

Memorial Day weekends of the past found my sister and I riding in the back of my grandparents' car, fighting hard for self-control to not tap each other or poke each other or do some other annoying thing to fill the 15 minute trip between cemeteries.

The trunk of the car would be filled with peonies -- beautiful arrangements cut from Grammy's heavy peony bushes, interlaced with greenery, placed in aluminum juice cans and wrapped in newspaper, ready to be dropped into the vases on the graves of remembered relatives. The plastic bucket and wooden handled brush were there, too. And a rag made from one of Gramps' old undershirts was tucked in between the juice-can vases.

First were Grammy's parents in the old part of the cemetery in Washington, IL, then out to the country near Deer Creek to honor other relatives, then back to Eureka to tend to Gramps' parents' graves and the smallest and most haunting, the grave of their daughter, my aunt, Patsy, who had died when she was just two years old.

We'd approach the graves carrying the peonies and a bucket. Gramps would go off to fill the bucket with water and Grammy would brush any leaves or grass from the headstone with the rag. When Gramps returned, they'd wash the stone carefully and arrange the flowers. Then they'd stand for a moment in silence.

By this time, my sister and I would be running around the other graves, careful to show the respect Gramps had reminded us of on the way there. But as I grew older, I watched this ritual more carefully. Rather than running through the gravestones, I stood by Grammy's side as she paused near her parents' graves. I watched as Gramps brushed away the grass clippings from Patsy's stone. I also stood in silence pondering these people who had come before.

This year it will be me who loads up the car with peonies and iris and whatever other flowers are in bloom. My grandparents have long stopped filling the vases and carrying the water buckets and bending over to tend the graves opting instead for a slow drive-by at their parents' graves and an amble across the hill to pause a moment with Patsy.

It is a great honor to be silently passed peony-duty. I have always found myself drawn to these parting-places -- places where we leave a remembrance of our beloveds having trusted that we do not leave them at all, for we have already returned them to their Creator's eternal care. To me these parting-places are places of deep Peace.

So this year, I will brush off the stones and place the flowers. And as a mother this year, I will wonder if when tending Patsy's grave, Grammy and Gramps have brushed the grass off of that stone and thought of the way her hair lay on her head and how they used to stroke it away. And as a daughter, I will touch the cold granite on my great-grandparents' markers and wonder if Gramps and Grammy have touched the stones on their parents' final resting places and remembered what it was like to lay a hand on Momma or Daddy as a child.

Tonight my husband and I took flowers to the grave of my father in law, Harold, Dennis' dad, who passed away several months before I came to this church, far too soon. I watched as Dennis crouched in front of the marker and brushed away the grass and used a little water from the irises we brought to rub away marks on the stone. His hand lingered tenderly on the picture of the tractor his mother had engraved on the stone. And I know that as he touched that Farmall, his heart was that of a little boy watching his Daddy plow the field.

Such a small space separates those we love who live now safe in the arms of God and those of us who must be content with this earthly life. In moments like those I will encounter at the cemeteries, moments of pause, the line between "here" and "there" seems so faintly drawn.

And perhaps that's because "here" and "there" are really the same; for those that have been, those that are and those that will be are all so closely held and deeply treasured in the heart of God.

It's just that in these times of reflection we see through a mirror dimly how close together we actually are.

And that is such a great blessing and a source of such deep Peace, that I find myself praying that every place will be a parting-place where every day I will be more aware of just how close to heaven we are when we rest secure in the promises of God.

Friday Five (or not): Total lack of motivation

The RevGals Friday Five was about habits today -- establishing good habits/ breaking bad habits. You'll notice I'm not playing. I have nothing constructive to add to the discussion, I think. I am embarrassed to say that I've not established any good habits. Everything I do that is good is intermittent at best. And I'm mortified to think of all the bad habits that are not only established but firmly entrenched. So I'm being an ostrich about the whole thing. Friday Five? What Friday Five?

In fact, I'm sitting here in a slightly dark house. I've pulled all the curtains and the kiddos are both asleep and I thought perhaps I'd take a nap, too. They were both up at a little before 6 this morning and today's grumpiness has far outshone (or perhaps out-dinged) the grumpiness of the other day so I thought a nap would be in the best interest of all of us.

But I'm also feeling as though it would be a very good idea to do the dishes and straighten up the house, and perhaps even mop the floor so that we could head into this weekend with a good deal of order around us.

So I'm sitting at the computer doing neither.

But, on a postitive note, I finished the church newsletter today and went to church for about 2 1/2 hours. That was good for all of us.

And now I'll at least do the dishes and mop the kitchen floor. Then perhaps I'll take a little rest if the children remain asleep. First steps. There. That's part of the Friday Five.

More great info from Holly

Holly has finished her series on acheiving wellness. This post has to do with natural supplements. Bless you, Holly!

Sooooo LOST

So I watched the season finale of LOST tonight. I just resent that show so much for sucking me in and not letting me go.

The day got better

After I wrote my first post this morning, I took a shower and had Daniel play in his bouncy chair and as I was typing, Annalivia climbed up on my lap and put both hands of my face and gave me kisses, then stroked my hair. It's hard to stay grumpy with that sort of care. Then I dozed on the couch while she stood at my feet and launched herself onto me while yelling, "Mmmmmoooooooommmmmmmmmmyyyyyyyy!"
Attitude readjustment acheived.

Grumpy momma

It's one of those mornings. Annalivia woke up very early. Way too early. And was mad/ sad/ inconsolable/ frustrated, etc. Daniel was fussy at the same time so I was feeding him while Annalivia found her milk sippy cup and stood in the door of the bedroom yelling, "Milk NOW!" I was responding very kindly to her -- giving her other options of what to do while I fed Daniel, so she began whining/ fussing. Then Daniel spit up all over himself and me and our nice sheets. And Annalivia threw the sippy cup on the floor. And Mommy got ticked.

I need to readjust my attitude. And fast. A couple more hours sleep wouldn't hurt either.

Help from Holly

Last year near this time, I was getting more and more into holistic wellness. We were eating well, actually getting some exercise and I was feeling better than I had for a long time. Then I got pregnant and we ordered pizza.

Now I'm feeling like I need this focus in my life again. Holly is one of those people who seems to me to have it all together in this regard partly because she readily admits that she doesn't. I asked her about seeking health and she has written here and here. (I'll add more references as she continues this series.)

Check it out if you need some basic info or encouragement, too. She also has some great links and some helpful stuff in the comments. Hurrah for Holly!!!

Kali Fest 2007

Today is my little sister, Kalin's 21st birthday.

On one hand, it is hard to believe that 21 years have passed. On the other hand, Kali has been a grown-up since she was born, so it seems as though it's about time that she pass this threshold.

To celebrate her birthday, and her legal ability to imbibe alcohol, we, her sisters, took her to Kelleher's, an Irish pub in Peoria. The joke was that the poor girl had to spend her 21st birthday with people who are usually in bed by 9:30 p.m. but we wanted to make it fun for her, so we came up with some fun things....

Yesterday in speaking with Kali, I asked her if she wanted us to wear anything in particular. "Aside from matching t-shirts?" she joked. That was enough to inspire t-shirts for all of us using this graphic. They said:

Kali Fest 2007; 21 May 6:30-8:30 p.m.; We're gonna rock and roll "all night"!

We also made her a crown with stars and a pageant sash that says birthday girl.

This photo was pretty much staged with any empty glasses we could find.

Marissa was in rare form and this was pretty much the theme of the evening -- Roo carrying on and Kali looking uncomfortably elsewhere.

And here we all are.

We laughed a whole lot and we did some pretty significant celebrating of our little Kalin Dara. Kali is among three of the most clever, original, hilarious, and intelligent people I've ever known. When I was 11 and she came into our family, we didn't know what to expect. What we got was this spectacular creature who made our family complete. She's an amazing, wonderful person and she's my sister. Happy Birthday, Bukes! I love you!!

The gift of good friends

A friend is entering the Search and Call system (our denominational system for matching churches and pastors). He asked me to be a reference and after I completed the questions, I called him and shared my answers.

He said it was uncanny how similar my answers to questions about him and his answers to questions about him actually were. I said that perhaps that's because we know each other pretty well. He said something like, "No, I think it's more than that."

And he's right. It is more than that. We do indeed know each other well, but this friend and another dear one and I have a friendship that goes beyond the basic "knowing each other." We met up in seminary and shared a little corner of C building. We wrote notes to each other in class, ate dinner as cheaply as we could find it, drove miles to see each other's big events, borrowed cars, rescued each other, staged interventions on another's behalf... We laughed and cried, fussed and fought, struggled and grew and we did it together.

The extraordinary thing is that we're still doing it together. We've talked about how we don't know if other seminary friends are still friends like we are. We are friends who talk to each other frequently and by that I mean, sometimes several times a week. We are godparents to each other's children. We are each other's most honest critics and staunchest supporters. We laugh and cry, fuss and fight, struggle and grow, move forward, move back, come in, come out... and we do it together.

He's right. It is more than the fact that we know each other. Perhaps it's that we allow the other to know us so well. I personally think it's that God saw that those three not only needed each other, but that by needing and knowing each other they were going to understand more about God's love and grace than they ever thought possible by themselves. It's that we're blessed. Together.

The risen Christ is everywhere... still

Tomorrow I am finishing a six-week sermon series on the resurrection appearances of Jesus. It has been a good series for me. I've taken apart the scriptures that the lectionary lumps together, jumped between the Gospels, and managed to hear new things in the text. That's always a very nice experience.

My sermon tomorrow uses the Great Commission text from Matthew. We don't have opportunity enough to preach this text a la lectionary, in my opinion, and there is a wealth of meaning, direction, and symbolism in it. I mean, I could probably preach an entire month on the phrase, "Go forth!"

But tomorrow I'm using it as the last of the resurrection encounters and though I don't write in manuscript form and therefore have almost nothing to post on this website ever, I wanted to talk about the sermon here because part of it is the "rest of the story" from an earlier post you can read here.

For those who would rather not read all the details, the gist of it goes like this -- my congregation was helping a family to whom we were introduced on Good Friday. They were people in need of much assistance and as we moved to offer assistance, God's people provided in amazing ways. The family, who had never been very involved with church, were amazed that folks would just offer themselves and their resources to others they had never met. It was a wonderful Easter story.

After Easter, the story of this family became more complicated. The man of the couple made some poor choices, was put in jail and eventually headed back to Arkansas to live with his parents. The woman of the couple struggled along, made some poor choices, had her children sent to her family in Indiana, and eventually followed.

For those of our congregation who know/ knew about it, they shook their heads and expressed sorrow and also some sense of resignation that these poor choices were made. What I have NOT heard, however, is a regret that we went out of our way to assist this family. Now perhaps that's because they don't whisper things like that in my direction. Or perhaps it's because they know the main point of my sermon tomorrow which is this -- even if "the nations" don't respond to the gospel, we're still sent forth to share the good news.

What I have realized again, in the course of helping this family, is that it would be really great if our evangelism or mission had a happy ending, or if all our efforts as Christians could be wrapped up in a neatly presented package, preferrably with a shiny bow on top. But that's not how it is some of the time, or perhaps even most of the time. Sometimes, despite our best efforts, despite our most sincere intentions, despite our most heartfelt prayers, folks don't respond to the gifts we offer. Sometimes they do, but sometimes they make poor choices, get put in jail or get sent back to Arkansas or Indiana!

Yet Jesus calls us to offer ourselves despite the fact that he had to have known much of our work would look like failure. We are still asked to treat each other as we want to be treated. We are still asked to give of our resources for the kingdom. We are still sent forth beyond our comfort zone.

If we look at Jesus -- we might be able to see that some folks might have called his mission a failure. Look at his life -- travelling from place to place followed by a motley band of arguing followers. Look at his death -- a brutal and bloody political assasination, abandoned by most everyone. Look at his resurrection -- supernatural and terrifying and when he ascended into heaven he left the work of evangelizing to the motley clueless followers who had abandoned him. One would hardly call that a successful implementation of the grand plan.

But as we know, the story goes far beyond that moment. The key is that the work of God is never done. Christ ascended to God's presence to be super-present with us through the gift of the Spirit. The disciples received the Spirit and went to work and through the labors of their hands and hearts AND the immeasurable gifts of the Spirit, the mission of Christ to bring folks to the Creator became and has become and is becoming one of success.

So often we think that if the work we do and the resources we use do not acheive the job that the job has failed. That the work is done. But the risen Christ is everywhere -- still! In the midst of our "failures," in the midst of poor choices, in the midst of exhausted possibilities, the risen Christ is still here. And the work is not done until the Spirit stops. And the Spirit doesn't stop.

So. Tomorrow we will talk about Christ's resurrection appearance among us... still...again. And again and again and again. We will also pray that Christ will continue to appear to those for whom our work and resources was not enough to lead them to the Kingdom. And we will pray that Jesus will remind us that he doesn't give up on us, even when we think we're done or when our hubris maintains that WE are those who bring the work of the Lord to completion. We will pray that he gives us the strength and the vision to keep putting him on -- keep working in his name -- keep proclaming him wherever and whenever we go forth.

He has come to us... still. He is here with us... still. He will be with us... still.

Alleluia! Christ is risen, friends! He is risen indeed! Still!

Recipe: Quick, skillet lasagna

It's getting warmer here and the search is on to find foods that can be cooked out on the grill or on the stovetop and thus not warm up the entire house. Here is a good one that worked well for our family. Have a nice salad and veggie on the side, and you've got yourself a really good meal.

Skillet Lasagna

1 lb ground meat

Sauce:

1 can chicken broth

1 small can tomato paste

1 can tomatoes with garlic and onion

1/2 cup wine

Italian seasonings to taste

salt/pepper to taste

1 cup ricotta or cottage cheese

1 egg

1/2 mozzarella cheese

1/4 parmesan

Italian seasonings

whole wheat lasagna noodles, broken, or whole wheat pasta like farfalle

1 c. mozzarella cheese

In large skillet with lid, brown meat. Remove, drain, rinse.

Add broth, paste, tomatoes, wine and seasonings to skillet. Whisk together til smooth, bring to a boil and allow to reduce a little. (Or just skip the homemade sauce and add a can of spaghetti sauce, tomatoes and the wine to the skillet.)

Add back the meat, then sprinkle in the noodles. While returning to a boil, mix cottage or ricotta cheese, 1/2 cup mozzarella, parmesan and seasoning together. Drop by spoonfuls into skillet. Cover and allow to simmer for about 15 minutes or til pasta is done and cheese looks like it does in lasagna! If there's too much liquid, allow it to simmer uncovered for a few minutes, but remember that it will continue to set up!

Remove from heat. Sprinkle remaining cheese over the top. Cover til and allow to melt.

Eat and enjoy!

The gift of good colleagues

Tomorrow my Disciples clergy friends from the surrounding area are going to get together for lunch. I'm looking forward to it. I missed several of our meetings while I was on maternity leave and I have found myself longing to connect with these folks again.

We are a rather motley group. There's L, the pastor at the church in Dixon. He has been there for almost 11 years and came out of a Assemblies of God background. He's in his late 40's early 50's, I think. He's very quiet, but has a great sense of humor. I can see why he has been at his church for a long time.

There's G, the pastor at Pine Creek, a little country church. G is a licensed lay minister. He is in his late 50's and just became a Disciple when he began serving this church four years ago. He is just the most intentional, sincere, good-hearted person. I think his church is blessed beyond deserving to have him.

There's D who has been the pastor across the river from me for almost 3 years. D is in his late 20's and is possibly the best pastor my age that I've ever met. He is a denominational super-star who is incredibly grounded, humble, honest, and hardworking. That's a rarity. And he's also pretty hilarious. I am so glad that he's the guy-at-the-church-across-the-river.

And, of course, there's me who has been here for almost 6 years. I'm the only girl. And I'm the only one who ever misses these meetings due to birthing. My main function is to arrive and introduce senseless rants on mainline decline into the conversations. I'm sure they just adore me there.

But I do adore them. We never have much of an agenda at these meetings. Basically, our agenda is to eat lunch, chat, listen to my rants. And laugh about the politics in our churches and denomination. Oh, and lament the politics in our churches and denomination. Then we figure out where we'll eat next month. That's always an important topic.

Like I said, I love them. When we go home from these gatherings, I am just so grateful for this group of good guys who are up here in northern Illinois with me. If all of my colleagues were like this, we'd have a really spectacular church, I think. Diverse and spectacular. They are just who they are without many frills. Without much posturing. They are trying to listen to God. Trying to live their callings. Trying to share the love of Jesus. Just trying.

And that's inspiring. It really is. Because sometimes I feel done with trying. Sometimes I don't get started at trying. Sometimes I get stuck trying the posturing and politicking. It's wonderful to know people who are trying in the best ways, who are doing ministry and are being as faithful as they can be.

They inspire me to come home and attempt to do the same. They inspire me to pray for them as I know they are praying for me. They inspire me. And really, that's about the best thing I could ask for in a group of clergy colleagues. I'm just so blessed that they are here.

Do Americans not have ears?

Ok. I am officially revealing myself as an American Idol viewer this season. So far, I've seen this season and season 1.

Tonight, Melinda Doolittle goes home with third place. She and Lakisha, who received fourth place were my favorites.

I understand how this little Blake guy can be in the competition, but HOW, HOW, HOW can this Jordin Sparks be a contestant still? She is consistently sharp and her voice is just grating.

And why do I care? Ugh.

Chocolate cake meets Annalivia

Well, the perfection of Dennis' celebration cake was shortlived. Someone got to it when Mommy and Daddy were talking.



See the little handprint?

He's home!!

Dennis has gotten home from a business trip to North Dakota! He has been gone since the wee hours of Monday and he originally expected to get home in the wee hours of this evening. But he got home early.

It's been an ok three days without him, but let me tell you -- I would not want to do this any more frequently than I absolutely must! Annalivia really missed him. Everytime someone called, she thought it was him. When he got home, she just laid on him for about a half hour.

He came home bearing good news -- he managed to eek two A's out of his MBA classes this semester! That's pretty amazing.

We're having a special dinner to celebrate it all -- Bruschetta stuffed Chicken Breasts with Zucchini and Carrots, Baked Potatoes and Chocolate Cake for desert. We're going to all look at each other for a while and be glad to be in each other's presence.

Wow. I'm glad he's home.

More non-annoying music for kids

I wrote about how Annalivia is into the Andrews Sisters then thought I'd also share these other albums that I do not find annoying.

NO! by They Might Be Giants. I love this cd. I actually listened to it for a long time before Annalivia was interested. My favorite is "John Lee Supertaster" which is in a cool funk style, followed by "Clap Your Hands" followed "I am Not Your Broom". Though, wait, "Sleepwalkers" is good, too, and so is "The Edison Museum"....

Here Come the ABC's by They Might be Giants. I like this cd, though slightly less than NO! We also have the dvd and it's ok. Not great. There are a couple of songs on the dvd that are not on the cd like "The Alphabet Lost and Found" which is a very hip song. I can't listen to it now though without feeling a little sick since we listened to it when I was first pregnant with Daniel and a little queasy all the time.

Philadelphia Chickens by Sandra Boyton and Michael Ford. Annalivia's godmother, Trina, gave this to Annalivia for her birthday along with several other Boyton musicals. It is a book with an attached cd. Philadelphia Chickens is my favorite. Meryl Streep and Laura Linney sing hilarious songs, but my favorite is Kevin Kline singing "Busy, Busy, Busy" in the style of Gilbert and Sullivan.

ETA... I forgot to add Dog Train, the most recent Boyton/ Ford creation. Pretty good, too.

And, FYI -- personally, I am not a fan of Dan Zanes. I know lots of Gen X-ers like it, but me -- not so much. I gave our DZ albums away.

And, because I have time and inclination to keep typing, here is some other music that works for Annalivia but was created for adults...

Perfect Time and Whisper to the Wild Water by Maire Brennan -- these are Christian albums by Clannad front and big sister to Enya, Brennan. The Celtic instrumentation is enthralling to Annalivia. They are ethereal and beautiful and uplifting and energizing and also calming. Lovely.

Take this Moment by John Bell. We listen to this a lot at church or in the car. There are some great jubilant pieces that allow Annalivia to dance and there are many more contemplative pieces that allow Momma to think. I love how the words go through my head later in the day, "God's gospel of light shall keep you. God's gospel shall shelter you..."

Keur Moussa: Sacred Chant and African Rhythms from Senegal by the monks of Keur Moussa Abbey -- This is another we listen to at church. I picked this up at the Catholic Bookstore in Peoria, IL just on a whim and ended up with a great cd. It's perfect for when Annalivia wants to listen to something and also wants to play with other things while I'm at church. It is nice, calm music and sort of blends into the background.

Joko by Youssou N'Dour -- good African rhythms and a social conscience, though most of it is not in English. I like it, she likes it. We're both happy.

Graceland by Paul Simon -- again good rhythms and probably one of my all-time favorite albums ever. I love it, though I probably still don't understand it. I also love Rhythm of the Saints but I can't find it, otherwise we'd be listening to that, too.

Choralworks by Howard Goodall-- Goodall is probably best known for his "The Lord is My Shepherd" which he wrote for the British TV series, The Vicar of Dibley, one of the best comedies ever created which I hope American tv will never, ever steal. The setting of Psalm 23 is one of my all-time favorite pieces and is on this cd. There is also some beautiful, modern English choral music. We play this in the afternoon sometimes and Annalivia makes note of it only when Momma sings along.

A Vaughan Williams Hymnal performed by the Choir of Trinity College, Cambridge. This was last summer's high choral purchase. Annalivia sang along with it then and still does. It's a favorite morning selection around here when the Andrews Sisters seem a tad too peppy.

So what are you and yours (whomever that may be) listening to these days?

Amalee's photos

Once again, Amalee is posting gorgeous photos over at her place. It is a visual vacation. Go see.

Altruism

9:30 p.m. and I cough.

From her bedroom comes Annalivia's sleepy, little voice, "Ok, mommy?"

"I'm ok, Annalivia. I love you."

"Yeah."

Mother's Day

It has been a lovely Mother's Day here. My sweet love took our daughter to get me a very sparkly card. Church went well. I didn't have to cook lunch. It's been very nice.

And I'm glad for it because yesterday I was a miserable parent. Terrible. Sinful. Perhaps unforgivable.

On days like that, I flee to Ann Voskamp's incredibly beautiful and moving site Holy Experience. Every time I enter her little haven on the web, I find God speaking grace to me in exactly the way I need. She is such an amazing gift. Yesterday words from this post and this prayer, both of which I had read a few months ago, spoke to me from the recesses of my brain in the midst of my parenting failures. I was so grateful to come to the computer later and find them and hear the promises Ann has found in the Word. And later in the day, this one had me weeping.

Thank you, Ann. And bless you. You help me to see Mother's Day and indeed every day as a little more holy.

Pals

My little boogie woogie bugle girl

So Annalivia's new favorite music is the Andrews Sisters. I think one reason she likes it is that she can climb up on the chair and push play on the cd player. The other reason is because it's pretty peppy and she can bob around to it. She was singing along with The Woodpecker Song today -- she sings about every 10th word, but on pitch. I love listening to her.

I'm so just glad she didn't get enamored with the Laurie Berkner band or some of the other children's music she has received. 1940's pop music is good. Now I just have to keep Dennis with his old KISS albums away from her. Of course, if she knows all the words to Roll Out the Barrel, that might not be so great either.

Guess who went Krogering today...

More pictures for Dusty

Recently, I have had the blessing of reconnecting with a dear friend from seminary. She sent me some adorable pictures of her beautiful daughters and requested some of Daniel and Annalivia. Well, I'm happy to oblige.

Annalivia and her new umbrella.

Um, believe it or not, she added the hat and glasses herself.

Happy Daniel

One Sunday Annalivia and I went to church without Daddy and Daniel.

She took her look-alike baby doll instead.

Eureka in full mocking-mode

This weekend Annalivia, Daniel and I are going to go to my hometown of Eureka to visit a friend and spend some time with the family. I love going home to my hometown and were gas not outrageous and my children slightly uncooperative, I'd probably find a way to head down there semi-weekly.
The only problem with going home is that I long for it when I'm away. This was particularly compounded a few weeks ago when we went to Eureka to spend the night and give Daddy some time to do homework without being bothered by his needy wife or verbal children.
It just so happened that Dennis' need to have peace and quiet coincided with the weekend of Eureka's Lilac Festival and Fine Arts Fair which is an annual event held on the campus of Eureka College, my alma mater.
This year the festival was on a day when it was almost 80 and the sun was shining. It was a tad windy, but it was gorgeous. As we came into town from my parent's house which is an old dairy farm on the edge of town, we saw that Main Street had been lined with American flags put up by the boyscouts, headed up by my scoutmaster father.
We first headed out to the lake where all the cousins got their picture taken together as directed by Grammy Adaline.

We hung around to see my nephew play soccer with the Eureka Youth Recreation Association and saw all sorts of parents being supportive and kindly competitive (really, honestly).

Annalivia and her cousin Cleya ran sprints under my direction. I'd have them run to a fence about 40 yards away before I counted to some random number. They enjoyed it and the lovely side benefit was that they were VERY tired out.
Little Lirah, who is in the stroller in the above picture took a nap on her handsome daddy's chest and channeled Yoda. Wise already she is.

And my sisters ran in the Eureka Spring Classic. And yes, that sister on the left is Lillia, who gave birth a week before I did. And ran five miles, but first walked out to the lake and then walked back home (another two miles). Sheesh.

Marissa placed in the top five(I can't remember which place exactly) in her age bracket.

Then we went to the college to hang out at the Lilac Festival. The College usually has a gorgeous grove of lilacs in bloom that was developed in the first half of the century by a professor; this year they were snowed upon, so no lilacs. Artists set up booths amongst the academic buildings and sell jewelry and paintings and scultpure and pottery etc. There is also live music, this year from a wonderful bluegrass band called Ashton Junction which features the banjo music of a native Eurekan. Several church youth groups sell treats, as well as the Eureka Hornet Music Boosters. And the Rotary sells porkchops, which Eureka Rotary Club does better than anybody else on earth, I think. My grandfather was collecting money for Rotary and came over to see Daniel. Daniel looks more like Gramps than any other family member, we think.
And we met up with my college friend, Remy, and her two energetic boys.

Essentially, it was my hometown at its best: beautiful weather, American pride, wholesome family activities, healthy athletes, artists and non-lilacs, good coffee and better friends, Gramps and Grammy, sisters and brothers-in-law, nieces and nephews.
I want to live there, too.
Can you tell?

Random thoughts on a quiet afternoon

It's 2:20 and all is quiet here in this house. Actually, all has been quiet for the last hour or so. Annalivia and Daniel have finally begun to coordinate afternoon naps. It's lovely. I should lie down and take one myself, but I'm doing some stuff I want to get done. And that is recharging me as much as anything else right now.

It has been a beautiful day here. The sun was shining this morning. Now it has clouded up a little, but it is also not quite so warm. I'm so glad that the spring is here, but, truthfully, I'm not really in the mood for 80 degree days just yet.

We had our carpets cleaned at church this week which necessitates me staying home during the day. Not that this is anything new at all, but it is nice to be mandated to stay home by something other than my own lack of desire to drag children and self into the office. I have a meeting tonight, so tomorrow I won't have this excuse. But yesterday and today, it was nice. And tomorrow, Wednesday, my secretary is out, so I'll be home again. Lovely.

And I'm grateful for the retreat. Our church family has been hit by yet another terminal illness. This time it is the 50-ish year old husband of a beloved member of the congregation. The woman who is the member of the church has grown up in the church and was a teacher in the community for 30 years before her MS forced an early retirement. The husband has lung cancer and has probably weeks to live at the most. Their daughters are slightly younger than me. I don't know how they will handle it. The family is close, but there is also a lot of posturing and secret-keeping going on. I am praying for their strength emotionally, spiritually, and physically.

And I am also praying for my little church. It seems as though we are holding so many of these situations in our hearts right now that at any moment, they might break open.

I find that for myself it is more and more difficult to bear the heartaches of others as my children grow and change. I'm so much more acutely aware of the tender strings that bind us to each other, I guess. And life seems so very full that it can't help to be fragile. Does that make any sense?

So, today, I'm just very grateful for a little quiet time to sit here in the warmth of my home and be thankful for my loves and this too short time we get to enjoy each other. I am reminded that I should contemplate the brevity of this blessing everyday. What a gift life is.

The Dark is Rising

The Dark is Rising is one of my all-time favorite juvenile book series. It's hardly exclusive to youth, like all good juvenile books. In fact, I re-read it last summer when I was first pregnant with Daniel and on the couch non-stop.

I just read that The Dark is Rising has been made into a movie of the same name and will be released in fall of 2007. I'm looking forward to seeing how it has been adapted for screen. It looks like it is being directed by a Hollywood outsider and filled with a cast of Brits, so I'm hopeful. It could be a very good movie.

My gift to us

I am so excited!! I have just won my birthday/ Mother's Day gift in an eBay auction! (Grammy and Pa, this is partly your gift to me!) It is this playset minus the swings and it is used, of course. Dennis, being my handsome and brilliant engineer, is going to make a swing addition for it. Best of all, I got it for $96!! We are going to pick it up in northwest Chicago, hopefully, next weekend. Oh man, this is going to be a fun summer!!

Happy anniversary to blogger and me

Today marks one year of blogging! I began this blog the day after my 31st birthday, inspired by lots of other cool chicas to create a place where I could process life "out loud."
Through it, my world has become so very much larger. Thank you to all of you who read and/ or comment. You have been quite the blessing.