Showing posts with label church chat. Show all posts
Showing posts with label church chat. Show all posts

03 January 2008

In the words of Kermit the Frog

"It's ok. Life is made up of meetings and partings. That is the way of it." ~Kermit the Frog as Bob Cratchit in The Muppets' Christmas Carol

One of my dearests passed away yesterday. She had been dealing with congestive heart failure for a long while, but it was a surprise when she actually passed away. I think my congregation is just in shock.

She had long told me that she was looking forward to going to heaven. She always said it with a huge smile on her face. And most everyone I've talked to talks about her return Home. But her family and friends and her church family will just ACHE with her loss. She was one of the kindest, sweetest, most selfless people ever and such a gift to all of us. It's always difficult to part with such dear ones.


And today I started this post in the wee hours of the morning waiting for my godson to arrive to spend a few days with us while his little sister (and our goddaughter) made her way into the world. This evening she arrived safely. And tomorrow we will meet little Caitlin Elyse and welcome this little gift into the world.

Partings. Meetings. Meetings. Partings.

That is, indeed, the way of it.

19 December 2007

Crrrrrrruuuuunnnncccchhhhh!

Only five days left.
One meeting.
One funeral.
One pageant rehearsal.
One Christmas pageant.
One extra service.
One concert.
One dinner out with my love.
One dinner to host.
Far too few presents wrapped.
Even fewer bought.

But no sermon.
God is so good.

26 November 2007

Time flies

I love church time. I love, love, love it. Really. I love how, once one actually gets through November and stewardship campaigns and budget meetings, time just races towards the New Year like water slipping past a dam of leaves. It just seems to seep towards newness of its own volition.

I suppose this could be threatening in some ways because there's just so much stuff to be done between now and then. Bulletins, sermons, services, newsletters, meetings, parties, gatherings... There is indeed a lot to occupy this time.

But I love that this happens at Advent when we celebrate God coming into a world that was not prepared to receive God-made-flesh. I love that despite what flimsy barriers or bullet points on our to-do lists we will try to construct between this time and the fullness-of-time, God will come anyhow. Racing in quickly. Slipping in quietly. Seeping in of God's own volition.

I love church time. It's really God's time. And it's so good to remember that because it's God's time, it's not April's time. And whatever I construct is not as important as the Source flowing over it.

15 November 2007

If only I had an anonymous blog

I could then tell you about the family for whom I am doing a funeral this weekend, the same family who has only been to church four times in the seven years I've been here because I "don't preach from the Bible", the same family who called today and said, "we have two scriptures in mind -- where is that one that talks about an evergreen being like the soul and the one about slipping the bonds of Earth to touch the face of God?" the family about whom it has suddenly become obvious that there might be a reason that they don't recognize that black book in front of me when I preach.
But I don't, so I won't.

30 October 2007

Snippets.

  • Daniel has graduated out of the travel system car seat. That means he weighs 22 lbs. He is a CHUNK. It's crazy how different he is from Annalivia. He is in 12-18 month clothes as he approaches his 9 month birthday. Annalivia was wearing 12-18 month clothing when she was 2 years old. Annalivia was always a 50th percentile child and for girls that's less than boys. Daniel has been at the 75th percentile and he's right on track, I guess. He seems huge. But maybe that's just because I tote him around.
  • The farm that Dennis and I have coveted for almost 5 years went on the market this weekend. We have an appointment to see it on Saturday. If it is to be ours, a number of truly miraculous events will need to occur. We'll see how it all unfolds.
  • We had a great visit from Annalivia's godfather, Jimmy, this weekend. It was lovely to see him.
  • I preached a terrible sermon while Jimmy was at church. There were many mitigating factors, but it just stunk big homiletic doo-doo. One of my favorite parishioners came up to me afterwards and gushed on about how great it was. Then she called me today and talked to me again about how much it helped her and spoke to several circumstances in her life. I'm so grateful that God works. Even when I don't.
  • Flylady and I are friends again. I'm sort of doing what she tells me to do. Whenever I do that, life goes so much better. I should just listen to her all the time.
  • My childhood best friend and her husband, one of my dearests from seminary, and their family, are moving to the twin city across the river from me. He is going to be the associate at the Disciples church over there. I'm excited. Friends! Here! Less than 3 hours away! I'm giddy with excitement.
  • I thought Annalivia was getting better at sharing things with other kids. She had done REALLY well at some different public places sharing toys and, um... intellectual property. But today I had some blood drawn at a clinic in Dixon where they have one of those intricate bead toys attached to a table and when we were leaving, she ran over to it and pushed a child who was considerably younger than she was who dared approach it. The mother looked like she was about to slap Annalivia so I grabbed her and apologized profusely while moving quickly towards the elevator. Luckily someone was holding the door so we had a pretty fast getaway.
  • Today while hanging out at our favorite bookstore, Books on First, in Dixon, a place we go at least once a week which is entirely too often, I found out that Dixon has a free concert series put on by the Episcopal church called The Canterbury Concerts (I love those Episcopalians and their gift for naming.) I also found out that our area has a community concert association and we can pay for a subscription and get tickets to some very cool concerts. Last year, Eileen Ivers was one of the featured guests. I think we'll try to subscribe next season. I'm so heartened to find out, after 7 years of living here, that there is some underground cultural opportunities. Lovely.
  • Today I got to meet Andrea for the first time! Our husbands drive to work together, so we probably should have met in person long ago, but we met first via blogs. Andrea is young and gorgeous and has a very handsome husband and beautiful, probably very well-behaved, children. (right, Andrea?) Her children were so sweet and her blog has a precious picture of them.
  • We met Andrea when we all happened to be at Woods' annual Halloween thing for the kids of employees. This is the first year that we made the trip. Annalivia did pretty well saying, "Trick or treat, please." But not so well with, "thank you," "hello," "I'm fine, thank you," or any of the other social niceties. Daniel was just pretty happy, which was good.
  • On the way home, I got to drive the van by myself and Dennis took the kids in the truck. 35 minutes of me-time. I spent most of it talking to Dad. It was lovely.
  • We are now into week 4 of no television at our house. It is interesting how my desire for media has diminished to almost nothing. I used to be an information junkie -- on the internet a lot, listening to NPR constantly in the car. Now I get online in the morning, sometimes, to check email and then when the kids go to sleep. I do my blog-jog, but don't comment usually because it takes too long. So apologies to Heather, Amalee, Jan, Jill, Amy, Amy and Jim, Andrea, Kalin, More Cows, other Andrea, Dusty, Geoff and Holly. Among others. I read; really, I do. Keep writing.
  • Even though I watch no television and spend less than an hour on the computer, I never get to read. How do you folks with 20 children find time to read? I need to know the secret.

Edited to add: The arm is better (thanks, Julie, for asking). I have a short cast on it and will, hopefully get it off on Nov. 7. The bone graft site is not so good. I still have burning, aching, shooting, prickling, any-other-sort-of-adjective pain every time I walk or stand for more than 2 minutes. I hobble around a lot, but I am choosing to believe that it will all be ok in the end. I'm alive. That's what this has kept in constant focus for me. I'm alive to enjoy my family. And that's more than enough.

10 October 2007

The tax man calleth

I don't know if the non-clergy folks who read this blog realize that when it comes to being taxed, lots of clergy get skewered by our dear US IRS. Since many of us are considered self-employed, we pay the part of our taxes that normal people have paid by their employers.
Figuring out taxes has been a major struggle for my 7 1/2 years of paid ministry. It got slightly better when I married Dennis and we had his company start with-holding enough to cover my part of our joint return. It got even better when I took a large paycut post-Annalivia and we also got our child tax credit.
The best so far has happened this year, though. Today our accountant called and we are getting an $800 refund from the Feds and $300 from the State for 2006!!
Finally, we have won the tax war! And this year, with Daniel's birth and a little less with-holding, we should be right on the money, so to speak. Maybe we'll actually file our taxes in April. Probably not. This is a pretty nice 3rd quarter surprise.

22 September 2007

Conditional grace

Yesterday, after her bath, Annalivia got out the hymnal and began singing at the top of her lungs. Apparently "The Itsy Bitsy Spider" made it into The Chalice Hymnal. O.I."Cricket" Harrison would be so proud.
My favorite song, though, appeared at the end of the concert.

It went like this,

"JESUS LOVES ME...

...ALMOST."

14 September 2007

In the meantime... vol. 2

I'm highly drugged and unable to complete coherent sentences. So, in the meantime, here's some info I'd like to disseminate....
Lo about two years ago, I put down my self-imposed ignorance and isolation and introduced myself to the theological world beyond my comfort zone. Previous to that, I had convinced myself that most conservatives and evangelicals were uneducated and uninformed. Turned out that I was the one who was uneducated and uninformed. I was enjoying living in a little cardboard box that really only had room for me. I didn't even realize that poor Jesus couldn't fit.
Anyway, choosing to willingly expose myself to theology that stretches and challenges me has been a great instructor. I have greatly enjoyed the practice of holding seemingly incongruous thoughts in my head at the same time. I have learned so much from the Spirit just by approaching Christianity as something I don't recognize or have all figured out!
I've noticed that lots of Christian bloggers like to be stretched. But some of the time, exploration of difference in the blogosphere or anywhere on the internet, actually, becomes dogmatic debate. Chrisitians of any ilk have a tendency to lob theology bombs in these conversations and if we can be clever or sarcastic in doing so, well... more points for our side.
And while I'm all for a good arm-pumping, "BOOYAH!!" every once in a while, I want to point out something unique I came across yesterday. An excellent example of gracious conversation can be seen here and here. I can't really add anything to the discussion, because I think it is just one of those that doesn't resolve, but I am SO IMPRESSED by the respect shown in these women's views. And most of the commenters follow suit, I think. Well done, Makeesha and Angela. Thanks for challenging the box with such wisdom. Very, very cool.

28 August 2007

Miscellany and minutiae

Right now #2 is sleeping and #1 is playing indoor ball. I have a few minutes, so wanted to update. Since this blog has become THE written record of our lives, I hate missing whole days or series of days of blogging, even if these updates are apoplectically boring to read. Many apologies to all of you out there! I've got all of these posts brewing in my mind that have not come to fruition. Someday perhaps.
  • We've had dodgy internet service all week. It's gotten to the point where I just get online to check email and then get offline again before my session is disrupted by lack of network.
  • Dennis started school last week. He is taking MBA classes three nights a week and drives to the Quad Cities, a little over an hour away. His classes are all at different times, but the earliest he gets home is about 9:30 at night. It makes for three very long days in a row for him, since he gets up a little after 4 a.m. to get ready for work. We are not yet in the groove with this schedule. In fact, we're all a bit adrift.
  • At work, Dennis has been designing this very cool and very huge cutter. This week, this prototype was developed by him. Pretty amazing, eh?
  • Daniel has been running a fever for the last few days for some mysterious reason. There's no infection, apparently, just a fever, and a consequently lathargic little bug.
  • Annalivia has been singing her ABC's constantly, loudly, along with Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star and The Wheels on the Bus and several other family favorites. So far this is very cute. But less so when she's singing the ABC's at the top of her lungs while Daniel is crying in the car.
  • A couple of days ago, Annalivia was standing on a chair in the dining room checking out her eyeballs in the mirror and turned to me, panicked, to say, "Mommy, look! My eyes are pink!" I showed her my pink eyelids. She felt better.
  • My sistah, Marissa, is getting married this weekend. I'm in charge of inviting folks to communion and pretending, with the rest of the sistahs, that the fact that we are wearing very similar black dresses and matching earrings is totally and completely coincidental and not at all because we somehow want to work ourselves into being bridesmaids. As we've shared with family, if we happen to pick up bouquets and walk down the aisle evenly spaced right before Marissa, so be it. Totally spontaneous. Really.
  • At church, we are going to be doing Sunday School for the first time in three years and I think we have not only found a great, fun, and incredibly hip curriculum, but have also found a way to do it and not burn out teachers all the while providing some consistency to the kids. Of course, all of this remains to be seen, but I'm excited.
  • And finally, I have a date of Sept. 11 for the next wrist surgery . Easy to remember, at least.

Hope all is well with all of you and yours!

20 August 2007

Today

Today was a fruitful day. In McStew-speak, that means we all got dressed and got out of the house. It's the little things that thrill us here.
This morning, Annalivia, Daniel and I ate breakfast at the table together. That was fun and sort of new for us. We usually eat breakfast in shifts. But I think we're going to try this more often. Daniel and Annalivia do lots of laughing at each other when we are all at the table. And once we firmly establish that Annalivia is not allowed to have Daniel's baby bananas until he is done with them, we're good to go.
We went grocery shopping at several different stores today and Annalivia had great behavior. She had chosen to wear a pale green Sunday dress today and I let her. She also decided to carry around with her a pink stuffed bunny rabbit that was mine when I was little. So lots of people smiled upon her and she responded graciously. Daniel was also in a pretty good mood in his baby pouch which always enthralls strangers. We had lots of people smiling upon all of us today in the stores, actually. That was sort of nice.
In the process of all that, I think I ditched a plumber who was giving the church a quote. I got stuck in traffic on my way back to church and, I think, made an erroneous assumption in my eagerness to get home and not drag children out into the rain. This wouldn't be a big deal, except that I didn't really divulge my part of the mistake to parishioner coordinating the whole effort and the more I thought about it, the more I realized that it could have seemed like I tried to swindle the parishioner. The guy is a good guy and very understanding, so I'll explain tomorrow, but it was one of those times when a long and drawn out dawning-realization reveals something negative about one's own actions. Not so much fun.
Anyway, it was good to get home from shopping and upon arriving home, I attempted to unpack groceries. A little while later, it occurred to me that I had not put the package of bacon I had purchased in the refrigerator. Annalivia had been, ahem, standing on it, so I asked her where it was and she said, "maybe in van." No, I assured her, it was not in the van. I asked her if she had taken it somewhere and she ran into her bedroom to show me the bacon chillaxin' with her stuffed animals in her toybox. Odd child.
So, bacon recovered, I proceeded to cook it up for BLT's with the anonymous tomatoes that were waiting on our porch the other day when we returned from some miscellaneous errand or other. We also had German potato salad, since we had bacon fat sitting around. It was all delicious, if I do say so myself. But we did not have enough bacon for lunch tomorrow so we have been forced to cook up another pound this evening. Our lives are hard.
And in other news -- we met with and hired a lawyer this evening to handle our personal injury cases from the accident. We both realized we couldn't possibly figure out our way around the settlement process, so it should feel like a relief, but we're both feeling a little flattened by it all. Not sure why, but we are grateful for the fact that someone else will deal with it from now on. And since we are paying them a lot, we're assuming they'll do a fine job. We hope.
And on that note -- to bed! Hope all is well out there in your worlds, blog friends. Good night.

09 August 2007

Phew.

You know the Bible 100%!

Wow! You are awesome! You are a true Biblical scholar, not just a hearer but a personal reader! The books, the characters, the events, the verses - you know it all! You are fantastic!

Ultimate Bible Quiz
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Brief books of the Bible

I have decided that my new sermon series at church will be called Brief Books of the Bible and each week I will preach a very vague, and probably, theologically unsound for many pastors, sermon on the "overarching" theme of a book.
Last week, I kicked off the series without even realizing I was doing it by preaching on Jonah. I basically retold the story and then made my big point. And it was a lot of fun. I think everyone else liked it, too. But the best part was that several folks told me throughout the week that they went home and actually read or re-read (but probably just read) Jonah. Which was very cool.
I'm thinking, and hoping and praying, that this sermon series will inspire folks to go home and read these brief books over again or, probably, for the first time. I think that would be very, very good for us. As a group we are incredibly, ashamedly Biblically illiterate. I don't know if that is a trait shared among most mainliners or just most Disciples, but it is not a trait of which to be proud. At all.
So I'm challenging my folks to go home and crack open these little books and spend the less-than-an-hour that it will take to read the four or five chapters. And then, at least, they will be able to say that they've read these parts of the Bible. Who knows? It might lead to reading the rest of the books, too.
At least, that's the hope.

17 July 2007

Higher expectations

I have been thinking a lot lately about the expectations we have or don't have for ourselves, our children, our family, our churches, and our society in general. Does it ever occur to anyone else out there that we are shortchanging ourselves in all of those areas?
I began thinking about this a couple of months ago when we took Annalivia and Daniel to their doctor for Annalivia's 2 year checkup and Daniel's 2 month check. It was about an hour past Annalivia's regular naptime and her behavior was, I thought, attrocious. She kept playing with the examining table, going through the diaper bag, running back and forth between me and the door... I was really very embarrassed.
At the end of the visit, our doctor told me that Annalivia was a very well-behaved child. I laughed out loud thinking that she was being sarcastic. She wasn't. It turns out that compared to most 2 year olds she sees, Annalivia's behavior was good. She was complimenting me on having an only partial-hellion on my hands.
In the past few months, well-meaning friends have attempted to comfort me regarding my parenting failures. One dear one asked, "Did you children eat today? Are they sitting in their own filth? Have any of them been beaten lately? No? You're doing fine."
In one way this beloved was correct. On most days, I am doing fine. The problem is, I don't want to settle for "fine". I want to do "well". I want do "faithful".
And frankly, I think that this is what my faith in Jesus is asking me to do. I personally think that, as Christians, we have settled for a lot of compromises in what we expect from ourselves and others in the name of Grace. It is not good enough to raise kids who don't rob the liquor store. It's not good enough to create a family that doesn't fall apart at some point. It's not good enough to pastor a church who doesn't spend over the budget or doesn't fight or doesn't do whatever it is that means a church is a failure. I think the life of a Christ-follower is to a higher calling than that.
And further, I think that we settle for lots because we don't want to feel a little icky about ourselves and our accomplishments or lack thereof. And we don't want others to feel uncomfortable about themselves and their accomplishments, or, ahem... the lack thereof. And I wonder if that's really the tactic we should take? I mean, please, please, please -- let's communicate that God always, always offers love and forgiveness to his children -- but let's also communicate that honoring God's work in our lives, claiming Christ as our Savior, means that we have to strive a little higher, work a little harder, be a little better than whatever it was we accepted from ourselves previously. (Yes, I said, "be a little better." I meant it.) I don't think that striving to attain high standards means we need to stand around spirtually, emotionally or physically flogging ourselves when we don't attain the prayed-for goal. In fact, we probably need to recognize that most of the time, we won't actually get where we are trying to head and at the same time continue to head in that direction as hard as we can.
I think it's time that we ask ourselves and others around us, in relationship and fellowship with us, for more. Yes, we cling to grace. Grace is the only thing that will allow us to do that which is beyond ourselves. And I really believe new life in Christ calls us beyond ourselves, and certainly beyond most standards expressed in the commons these days. We must press on, not in arrogance but in dependence on the love of Jesus to focus and sustain us. Probably all of this can be said much better here...
"So let's keep focused on that goal, those of us who want everything God has for us. If any of you have something else in mind, something less than total commitment, God will clear your blurred vision - you'll see it yet! Now that we're on the right track, let's stay on it. Stick with me, friends. Keep track of those you see running this same course, headed for this same goal. There are many out there taking other paths, choosing other goals, and trying to get you to go along with them. I've warned you of them many times; sadly, I'm having to do it again. All they want is easy street. They hate Christ's Cross. But easy street is a dead-end street. Those who live there make
their bellies their gods; belches are their praise; all they can think of is their appetites. But there's far more to life for us. We're citizens of high heaven! We're waiting the arrival of the Savior, the Master, Jesus Christ, who will transform our earthy bodies into glorious bodies like his own. He'll make us beautiful and whole with the same powerful skill by which he is putting everything as it should be, under and around him."
Philippians 3: 15-21 from The Message

12 July 2007

VBS and possible daquiris

We have been having a great time at Vacation Bible School this week. This is the first time my little church has done VBS for at least the last seven years, but I think it has been more like 10.
Sidenote -- it is hilarious to me that some folks talk about the last time that we did VBS as something that was just last year or so. I'm in my 7th year here and we've never done VBS. Church time just functions differently than the rest of the world, I guess.
Anyway, this year, we are doing VBS and it has been fun. Really fun. Tiring, of course, but great, not only for the kids who have come (which is up to 19 now, not counting mine -- a 1900% increase over worship attendance by children other than Annalivia and Daniel) but for the adults, also.
The funny thing is that our theme is water-centered and on a rotation model where the kids visit four different stations during the evening, so folks have been making jokes about how the adults will need to have a special margarita/ daquiri station the last night of Bible school after the kids go home. And now, there is an actual party in the planning.
I've enjoyed joking around with them, but I'm not sure whether I should go to the party. I am not opposed to drinking alcohol, I just don't do it anymore really. If I was a 40 year old pastor of a congregation, I might go and throw back a daquiri with my middle-aged congregants. But as the young girl who came here a little too recently-departed from college-frat-party age, I feel a little odd about it. Probably I will go for a bit, enjoy the frivolity sans fruity drink, and then leave them to their crazy fun without the pastoral presence to hem them in.
I don't know... I'm probably being too stuffy, aren't I? A few years ago (closer to the college-frat-party age), I wouldn't have thought twice about joining in. I'm such an old fuddy-duddy now.
Well, regardless, VBS has been great. I think we'll all be ready for it next year. And for us, that's what really deserves a celebration!

03 July 2007

In which my mainline friends disown me

So last Sunday at FCC Rock Falls, we had a patriotic sing instead of the sermon. It was a full-fledged we-love-America-palooza with national hymns, secular songs both fun and more serious.
In preparing for this event, I talked to a couple of pastor friends and told them the plan. Their response was something like, "Are you serious?" or "Oh no..." I told them I had thought about ways to justify it theologically and that I didn't want to embarrass either them or me, so I'd not share the thoughts, but as I've been thinking about it more, I want to do so and then get feedback from anyone who is willing to talk about it.
I'll begin by saying that I believe that using the Bible to support national superiority is wrong. I don't want England or France to be reading the Psalms or Romans with that sort of interpretation, so I feel like the same should apply to us. But I am just not sure that any national celebration or recognition in the church is "wrong."
As I told my church before we sang had our America-fest, I think most of us are smart enough to realize that when we say that our country is blessed, we don't believe that others in their countries are less blessed. Most of us don't apply a belief of selective blessing to our families, do we? I mean, I believe the McStews are abundantly blessed by God, but I would never assume that meant that God does not bless the Jones family and the Razinskis and the Al-Shamas. When I say "God bless America", that is my heartfelt prayer -- that God will bless our country. It is not a prayer that God will not bless England or France or Iran or wherever.
And as for expressing gratitude for the blessing we have received and will receive as a nation in the setting of corporate worship in the church building, I frankly don't understand the idea that we shouldn't bring these realms together. If the church does not exist to speak to our everyday lives, including how we live as citizens of a country or members of a family (in the case of Mothers/ Fathers Day which also tends to be loathed by mainline pastors) or brothers and sisters in the realm of God, I guess I wonder -- why do we exist?
I have to admit, I was a person who, for many years of ministry, resisted all of the things I was supposed to resist as a mainline pastor -- patriotism, overt displays of Christian identification in marriage, child-rearing and family formation (more about that later), celebration or recognition of "secular" concerns...but I have to say -- I don't know why I did. I wasn't thinking critically nor was I praying about where God would have me lead. Now, I really believe I *am* thinking critically. And I most certainly am spending a lot of time in prayer and believe that God is leading me the direction of recognizing that being a Christian is about bringing faith to bear on absolutely all areas of life including our national identity.
So -- those of you who heartily disagree with anything I've said -- what has led you to your conclusions? I really honestly would like to know, because I think I've missed something. And if anyone can tell me what that is -- well, I'd sure appreciate it.
In the meantime -- God bless America. And happy Independence Day.

20 June 2007

Where two or three are gathered...

Last night we had an elders' meeting at church. In our system, the elders are the actual leaders of the church. Technically, I'm just an ordained elder. I like elders' meetings. These are the spiritual leaders of the church and most of these men and women take that duty very seriously. They are mostly very wise, deliberate, and discerning.
At the end of every elders' meeting, I lead a prayer as we hold hands and then we all say the Lord's Prayer together. Because there are only 10 of us, and it's rare that all of us are actually there at the same time, we fit nicely around one of the round tables in our fellowship hall.
I have found that one of my favorite things about this time is listening for each individual voice as we are praying together. I hear Larry's strong bass and Kathy's mellow alto and Carl's gravely tenor. I hear Tim strong, but not overpowering and Edythe's slightly rushing and Alice and Sharon, quiet and low.
There is something to be said for common, memorized prayer. As a restoration movement who was founded on the idea of returning to the New Testament description of the church, this is our sole common prayer. But I understand why other sects have found such power in shared, memorized prayer. There is something about all of God's people speaking as one voice the words of the faith from their hearts that reminds me of the reason we are all Church together.
"For where two or three are gathered in my name, I am in the midst of them..." Mt. 18:20

30 May 2007

Being a daughter of Clara

Every once in a while (and actually more often than that, if I'm honest) it occurs to me that it is just impossible to be a mother and a pastor at the same time.
But tonight I spent some time reading about Clara Babcock. Clara was the first officially ordained female minister in the Christian Church (Disciples of Christ) back in 1888 or 1889. But before her official ordination, she was an evangelist, speaker, and elder who baptized many individuals, according to our church records here at First Christian, Rock Falls. Rev. Babcock was an unflinching preacher and led many revivals around our area. She was not one to let much stand in her way. And there are stories told of her preaching and also rocking her child to sleep in a cradle set behind the pulpit.

Every once in a while (and more often than that) I am fairly convinced that it is impossible to mother and pastor at the same time.

But the 1,502 people Clara Babcock baptized during her life would probably tell me otherwise.

19 May 2007

The risen Christ is everywhere... still

Tomorrow I am finishing a six-week sermon series on the resurrection appearances of Jesus. It has been a good series for me. I've taken apart the scriptures that the lectionary lumps together, jumped between the Gospels, and managed to hear new things in the text. That's always a very nice experience.
My sermon tomorrow uses the Great Commission text from Matthew. We don't have opportunity enough to preach this text a la lectionary, in my opinion, and there is a wealth of meaning, direction, and symbolism in it. I mean, I could probably preach an entire month on the phrase, "Go forth!"
But tomorrow I'm using it as the last of the resurrection encounters and though I don't write in manuscript form and therefore have almost nothing to post on this website ever, I wanted to talk about the sermon here because part of it is the "rest of the story" from an earlier post you can read here.
For those who would rather not read all the details, the gist of it goes like this -- my congregation was helping a family to whom we were introduced on Good Friday. They were people in need of much assistance and as we moved to offer assistance, God's people provided in amazing ways. The family, who had never been very involved with church, were amazed that folks would just offer themselves and their resources to others they had never met. It was a wonderful Easter story.
After Easter, the story of this family became more complicated. The man of the couple made some poor choices, was put in jail and eventually headed back to Arkansas to live with his parents. The woman of the couple struggled along, made some poor choices, had her children sent to her family in Indiana, and eventually followed.
For those of our congregation who know/ knew about it, they shook their heads and expressed sorrow and also some sense of resignation that these poor choices were made. What I have NOT heard, however, is a regret that we went out of our way to assist this family. Now perhaps that's because they don't whisper things like that in my direction. Or perhaps it's because they know the main point of my sermon tomorrow which is this -- even if "the nations" don't respond to the gospel, we're still sent forth to share the good news.
What I have realized again, in the course of helping this family, is that it would be really great if our evangelism or mission had a happy ending, or if all our efforts as Christians could be wrapped up in a neatly presented package, preferrably with a shiny bow on top. But that's not how it is some of the time, or perhaps even most of the time. Sometimes, despite our best efforts, despite our most sincere intentions, despite our most heartfelt prayers, folks don't respond to the gifts we offer. Sometimes they do, but sometimes they make poor choices, get put in jail or get sent back to Arkansas or Indiana!
Yet Jesus calls us to offer ourselves despite the fact that he had to have known much of our work would look like failure. We are still asked to treat each other as we want to be treated. We are still asked to give of our resources for the kingdom. We are still sent forth beyond our comfort zone.
If we look at Jesus -- we might be able to see that some folks might have called his mission a failure. Look at his life -- travelling from place to place followed by a motley band of arguing followers. Look at his death -- a brutal and bloody political assasination, abandoned by most everyone. Look at his resurrection -- supernatural and terrifying and when he ascended into heaven he left the work of evangelizing to the motley clueless followers who had abandoned him. One would hardly call that a successful implementation of the grand plan.
But as we know, the story goes far beyond that moment. The key is that the work of God is never done. Christ ascended to God's presence to be super-present with us through the gift of the Spirit. The disciples received the Spirit and went to work and through the labors of their hands and hearts AND the immeasurable gifts of the Spirit, the mission of Christ to bring folks to the Creator became and has become and is becoming one of success.
So often we think that if the work we do and the resources we use do not acheive the job that the job has failed. That the work is done. But the risen Christ is everywhere -- still! In the midst of our "failures," in the midst of poor choices, in the midst of exhausted possibilities, the risen Christ is still here. And the work is not done until the Spirit stops. And the Spirit doesn't stop.
So. Tomorrow we will talk about Christ's resurrection appearance among us... still...again. And again and again and again. We will also pray that Christ will continue to appear to those for whom our work and resources was not enough to lead them to the Kingdom. And we will pray that Jesus will remind us that he doesn't give up on us, even when we think we're done or when our hubris maintains that WE are those who bring the work of the Lord to completion. We will pray that he gives us the strength and the vision to keep putting him on -- keep working in his name -- keep proclaming him wherever and whenever we go forth.
He has come to us... still. He is here with us... still. He will be with us... still.
Alleluia! Christ is risen, friends! He is risen indeed! Still!

17 May 2007

The gift of good colleagues

Tomorrow my Disciples clergy friends from the surrounding area are going to get together for lunch. I'm looking forward to it. I missed several of our meetings while I was on maternity leave and I have found myself longing to connect with these folks again.
We are a rather motley group. There's L, the pastor at the church in Dixon. He has been there for almost 11 years and came out of a Assemblies of God background. He's in his late 40's early 50's, I think. He's very quiet, but has a great sense of humor. I can see why he has been at his church for a long time.
There's G, the pastor at Pine Creek, a little country church. G is a licensed lay minister. He is in his late 50's and just became a Disciple when he began serving this church four years ago. He is just the most intentional, sincere, good-hearted person. I think his church is blessed beyond deserving to have him.
There's D who has been the pastor across the river from me for almost 3 years. D is in his late 20's and is possibly the best pastor my age that I've ever met. He is a denominational super-star who is incredibly grounded, humble, honest, and hardworking. That's a rarity. And he's also pretty hilarious. I am so glad that he's the guy-at-the-church-across-the-river.
And, of course, there's me who has been here for almost 6 years. I'm the only girl. And I'm the only one who ever misses these meetings due to birthing. My main function is to arrive and introduce senseless rants on mainline decline into the conversations. I'm sure they just adore me there.
But I do adore them. We never have much of an agenda at these meetings. Basically, our agenda is to eat lunch, chat, listen to my rants. And laugh about the politics in our churches and denomination. Oh, and lament the politics in our churches and denomination. Then we figure out where we'll eat next month. That's always an important topic.
Like I said, I love them. When we go home from these gatherings, I am just so grateful for this group of good guys who are up here in northern Illinois with me. If all of my colleagues were like this, we'd have a really spectacular church, I think. Diverse and spectacular. They are just who they are without many frills. Without much posturing. They are trying to listen to God. Trying to live their callings. Trying to share the love of Jesus. Just trying.
And that's inspiring. It really is. Because sometimes I feel done with trying. Sometimes I don't get started at trying. Sometimes I get stuck trying the posturing and politicking. It's wonderful to know people who are trying in the best ways, who are doing ministry and are being as faithful as they can be.
They inspire me to come home and attempt to do the same. They inspire me to pray for them as I know they are praying for me. They inspire me. And really, that's about the best thing I could ask for in a group of clergy colleagues. I'm just so blessed that they are here.

08 May 2007

Random thoughts on a quiet afternoon

It's 2:20 and all is quiet here in this house. Actually, all has been quiet for the last hour or so. Annalivia and Daniel have finally begun to coordinate afternoon naps. It's lovely. I should lie down and take one myself, but I'm doing some stuff I want to get done. And that is recharging me as much as anything else right now.
It has been a beautiful day here. The sun was shining this morning. Now it has clouded up a little, but it is also not quite so warm. I'm so glad that the spring is here, but, truthfully, I'm not really in the mood for 80 degree days just yet.
We had our carpets cleaned at church this week which necessitates me staying home during the day. Not that this is anything new at all, but it is nice to be mandated to stay home by something other than my own lack of desire to drag children and self into the office. I have a meeting tonight, so tomorrow I won't have this excuse. But yesterday and today, it was nice. And tomorrow, Wednesday, my secretary is out, so I'll be home again. Lovely.
And I'm grateful for the retreat. Our church family has been hit by yet another terminal illness. This time it is the 50-ish year old husband of a beloved member of the congregation. The woman who is the member of the church has grown up in the church and was a teacher in the community for 30 years before her MS forced an early retirement. The husband has lung cancer and has probably weeks to live at the most. Their daughters are slightly younger than me. I don't know how they will handle it. The family is close, but there is also a lot of posturing and secret-keeping going on. I am praying for their strength emotionally, spiritually, and physically.
And I am also praying for my little church. It seems as though we are holding so many of these situations in our hearts right now that at any moment, they might break open.
I find that for myself it is more and more difficult to bear the heartaches of others as my children grow and change. I'm so much more acutely aware of the tender strings that bind us to each other, I guess. And life seems so very full that it can't help to be fragile. Does that make any sense?
So, today, I'm just very grateful for a little quiet time to sit here in the warmth of my home and be thankful for my loves and this too short time we get to enjoy each other. I am reminded that I should contemplate the brevity of this blessing everyday. What a gift life is.